Why can’t my dad be a dad?

C’est la vie

It’s about time for me to come to grips with the fact that tomorrow morning I will be getting in our little plane and heading south towards the land of the free and the home of McDonalds. Although I am looking forward to moving back to school, it comes with seeing people I don’t want to see and facing drama that I am just not up to. To make maters worse, I write about these hard realities as I am sitting next to a fire under a vast canopy of stars and am serenaded by the cries of the loons and the chatter of the wolves while the northern lights dance across the sky. Even though it’s still August, I can see my breath in the crisp, Northern night air.

Why is it that life has become so much more complicated? What happened to the carefree days of my not so distant past? I can still remember the vibrance and zeal that were the staples of who I used to be. The happiness that I felt has left it’s branding on my heart as a constant reminder that things aren’t as they used to be.

Returning my thoughts to more positive things, one of the perks of being so far from civilization is that I can whistle a tune and hear it whistled back to me over and over getting quieter each time. It’s nice to not hear the voices of people on the passing boats at home.

Looking up, the holes in the floor of heaven are even brighter now than when I first came out. To the shooting start that just left it’s last glimmer of life blazoned across the sky, I wish that the train of life would hop back on the rails.

As I prepare to douse this fire and end this nostalgic rant, my thoughts return to when was setting up this campfire and heard a bear across the bay. I’m hoping that he hasn’t found his way over here so I will have to remember to whistle “Margaritaville” as I walk back to the cabin so that I don’t find myself face to face with a bear that’s as excited to see me as I am to see him. Too late. There are currently chills running down my spine as I finish writing this post inside. Just as I wrote that I heard the distinct scraping that could only be a moose on the close side of the bay. By the time I have the internet to post this, I will be back in the predictable safety of civilization.

Let’s hope that falling star grants my wish and allows me provide company for the branding on my heart in the form of future happiness.

Goodnight, all. Wish me luck as I go into the next few months. I’m going to need it.

The Christian life is not a constant high. I have my moments of deep discouragement. I have to go to God in prayer with tears in my eyes, and say, ‘O God, forgive me,’ or ‘Help me.’
Billy Graham  (via peterdwebb)
of-hipsters-and-men asked:
Values and people change that's for sure

What do you mean by that?


Fuck up your sleeping schedule with me so i know it’s real. 

Anonymous asked:
Do you like the person you've become?

We all change. We grow from circumstances. Mistakes. Pain. What we become is still us just an evolved version of our prior selves. What change are you referring to?

of-hipsters-and-men asked:
I don't want a break at all

What break?

You know when you build a house with someone in your mind? Then with time it turns into a home. My own personal refuge. Then that person leaves and you’re left all alone in this imaginary house with all your imaginary happy memories longing for something real.

Everyone leaves eventually. We’re all just living our own separate lives.

(Source: alisonturnerphoto.com)

(Source: alanapaterson)